Tag Archives: film

My (extremely negative) review of the Glee 3D Movie

I had the displeasure of watching this film on Thursday when it opened here in Australia. I was quite surprised to find that myself and my boyfriend were the only people in the cinema (perhaps I should have taken that as a hint!). As demonstrated by my previous post (An Analysis of Glee’s Fall from Grace) I have mixed feelings about the show – specifically, that it has disappointed me since the start of its second season, and that it tries too hard to send corny messages which, in my opinion, it doesn’t effectively portray. And yet people obsess over it anyway, go figure.

Anyway, I was excited about the film because I like watching the cast perform, and because from watching the trailer I gathered that the performances would be intercut with footage of the cast. I must say that watching the cast performing was not a letdown. It was great to see that they are all talented, and much to my relief, the performances were not overly cheesy nor were they too long.Whoever your favourite cast member or character is, I doubt you will be disappointed by their performance. And despite being a 3D hater, the 3D was quite good for the performance segments because parts of it enhanced the feeling of being in attendance at the event.

Those are my positives. Now, onto the good old negatives. The cast was obviously supposed to be in character, and whilst they were reciting lines that their characters are likely to say, there did not seem to be any real conviction behind them. This weird hybrid of the cast being half in character does not bode well – it makes one wonder why they couldn’t make a decision to be either a) their character or b) themselves, in order to make it seem more real. The dialogue appeared heavily improvised, so perhaps having scripted dialogue would have improved such scenes. Springing a camera on the cast and expecting them to recite lines that sound like they could have come from their character’s just didn’t work.

Predictably, my least favourite part of the whole film was the ‘real life’ stories of Glee fans which were thrown in at various times throughout the film. I had no idea that the film would feature storylines like this, and this was definitely a clever move on the part of the makers, because it would have certainly made fans like me think twice about seeing the film. You want the truth? I just don’t care. I can enjoy Glee (sometimes), but it doesn’t affect me in any way, and hearing people discuss how its changed their lives makes me feel like an outsider, and truly makes me think they’re a little sad. What made these storylines worse was that they came across as disgustingly orchestrated as though they were some kind of advertisement or marketing campaign to sell the show (as if they aren’t making enough money as it is!) To top it off, these scenes had no 3D effect whatsoever. I don’t mean that the 3D wasn’t particularly good, I literally mean that they were not 3D at ALL. So not only do you fork out extra cash to see the film in 3D, but half of it (and the worst parts too) aren’t even 3D!

Ultimately, the film is a shoddy marketing ploy that is getting far too much attention than it deserves. I sincerely hope that Gleeks everywhere will be able to step outside of their Glee bubble long enough to realise that they are being played for fools.




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Filed under Film, Lea Michele, Television, Uncategorized

Review: Pirates of the Caribbean 4


Ah, Pirates of the Caribbean. I have a strange history with this series of films, but one that I doubt I am alone in. When I first saw the first film, ‘Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl’, I was quite young, 12 years old in fact, and I completely fell in love. Not just with Johnny Depp, but with the humour of the film and even with the idea of pirates. It actually inspired me to do my final Grade six oral presentation on pirates (which went very well thank you).

After the second film, I lost interest. I saw the third, found it utterly forgettable, and only saw the latest in a sheer act of kindness towards my boyfriend who begged me to see it with him. Unfortunately, I must report that it was not an enjoyable experience. Sure, Jack Sparrow is still just as Jack Sparrowish as ever, and we all love that, but after four films it really does seem like his character is simply a stand-alone feature that the filmmakers have fallen too in love with to let go. I honestly pity Jack because he probably wants his story to be over too, and the really sad part is, that feeling of holding onto something that should be long gone has somehow seeped into the film itself. It just feels… strained.

My biggest problem with the film was actually Penelope Cruz. Now, I adored Miss Cruz in Woody Allen’s ‘Vicky Christina Barcelona’ but in Pirates her character seemed perpetually dull and utterly forgettable. It is evident that there was a clear move to make her appear as the fiesty, sexy woman who even Jack Sparrow can’t resist, but that whole concept felt entirely a little too obviously orchestrated causing me to just not feel ‘it.’ By ‘it’ I mean one of the most essential aspects a movie trying to sell a romance must contain: chemistry. Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruz? Nope. Sorry, both great actors, but together they did not ignite the screen in a way that might have made the film a tad more interesting.

The story of course follows a painfully familiar line as the other films: Jack must help several group of baddies find something ever so powerful that they really shouldn’t want to find, in this case, the fountain of youth. There is a fair bit of filler-in time featuring a romance between one of the men, Phillip, and a mermaid, but I was falling asleep at this point.

One of the most disappointing aspects of the film was its ending. Why? Well, because it didn’t end. Yes, it is my sad duty to report that there will undoubtedly be a fifth Pirates film made, at least based on the ending or lack thereof of this one. It’s sad really. A film that once brought me such joy has turned into a running joke… Can fourth sequels of a film ever be any good, really? That’s an unanswerable question I’m afraid. All I can say is, the fourth Pirates sequel would suggest not.

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Filed under Celebrities, Film, Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz